


heart.

by yokohbadboy



Category: Bleach
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Tragedy, Canon Compliant, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Sad and Sweet, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:21:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25641232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yokohbadboy/pseuds/yokohbadboy
Summary: what is a heart? a question that he couldn't understand, until it was too late.
Relationships: Ulquiorra Cifer/Inoue Orihime
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	heart.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry if the characters are ever ooc, this is the first time that i've written a bleach fic. i'm still watching it too.

> "What is a heart? If I rip open your chest, will I see it inside? If I split your skull, will I see it inside?"

I jolt awake, my back hurting a bit after sleeping against the couch. What was that? Ulquiorra-kun was talking about...

I shake my head, attempting to erase the thoughts out of my mind by sheer force. My heart drops as I sense Sado-kun's reiatsu dwindling.

It's alright, Orihime. Sado-kun's strong..

I wonder how Kurosaki-kun is doing. I hope he's not pushing himself too hard. I've spent my days here in Las Noches with a hint of sadness. I came here to protect everyone after all, did I think it would be pleasant? Yet once again, I've become a burden to him. I stand up and look up at the crescent moon through the barred window.

"I'm coming in." 

Hearing the door open, I turn around. It's Ulquiorra-kun.

"It seems you've noticed. That fool, Nnoitra, got impatient. Even though he was ordered to wait in his palace.

_"Sado-kun's not dead."_

He looks away, unwilling to listen to me. There's a tingle of irritation in my chest.

 _"He's not dead,"_ with a hardened look, I say.

A quick glance at me and back, "Come in." Ulquiorra-kun moves from in front of the exit. An arrancar wheels in a trolly with, supposedly, my meal.

"Your meal. Eat."

_"I don't need it."_

His head turns around towards me, his devil-like eyes stuck upon my own. "It is your duty to maintain your health until Aizen-sama summons you."

"Eat."

I feel myself taken aback by his cold gaze, though, I speak not a word. 

"Shall I force it down your throat? Or shall I strap you down and give you nutritional injections?" His words are prickly, like thorns in my skin. My right arm holds my left, the uncomfortable feeling in my chest, still present.

_"Sado-kun isn't dead."_

"How vexing. That doesn't matter," he pauses,

"What do you want me to say?"

"Don't worry? He's probably alive?"

"How foolish. I'm not here to humor you." Don't say that.

"Why fuss over whether he's alive or dead?" I turn to look at him, hurt by his words.

"One way or another, all your friends will soon perish. One of them just happened to die early. You should have known this would happen." 

_"Stop."_

"If you didn't, then their foolishness is at fault." Again, I look at him in disbelief. 

You're wrong. They wouldn't die so easily..

"Laugh it off and tell yourself they were fools. Why can't you do that? If I were you, their stupidity in rushing here, unaware of their own incompetence,

**would absolutely disgust me."**

That feeling in my chest is too much to bear. I step forward and slap him across the face.

The sound echoes through the room. My own breathing, heavy. Beads of sweat cover my face. He glances at me, still emotionless as ever.

"I'll return in an hour." He turns around and starts to walk out.

"If you haven't eaten by then, I'll tie you down and force-feed you. Keep that in mind." The door slams and I'm left there with all of my jumbled feelings.

It feels like I just ran a marathon. My heart begins to slow down from its racing state.

_Inhale._

_Exhale._

_Inhale._

_Exhale._

Although my chest rises and falls calmly, there's a stirring deep down inside. That tingle still won't go away.

Ulquiorra-kun. He makes me so irritated sometimes.

_"Might as well eat."_

I sit down on the stone cold chair, with the trolly of food in front of me. Lifting the lid up, there's a bowl of warm porridge. Aizen-sama must've prepared his rations ahead of time in Seireitei.

While I eat, I savor the warmth that it provides me. After my meal, I spend my time gazing at the sky or pondering in my feelings. Before I know it, an hour has passed.

The door opens once again.

"I see you listened to me, woman." He turns to the arrancar behind him, "Take it away."

The arrancar quickly rolls the trolly out, leaving just Ulquiorra-kun and I in the room. Why didn't he leave yet?

 _"Is there something you need from me?"_ I'm unsure of my words, what would he ever need from me? 

He approaches me nonchalantly, his steps are steady. And then, he was right in front of me. Just looking at me. "Do you ever regret coming here? Though, it was never a choice for you."

Why was he asking me this? _"If it meant saving the lives of my friends, of course not. But, now that they're here.. I don't know, maybe I do regret it. Just a little."_

"On the other hand, I do not ever regret my decisions. That includes retrieving you too, although it was Aizen-sama's order." What is he trying to say?

"You are, indeed, a vexation. But you fascinate me with your human morality."

_"I fascinate you?"_

His left hand goes up, to in front of my eyes. "The way, you humans, think. It's amusing."

He, then, moves his hand to touch a lock of my hair. _"Ulquiorra-kun..? Ah-"_ His cold, boney hand brushes lightly past my face.

"A fine specimen.." I could just barely hear his words. What did he mean by 'specimen'?

 _"Specimen?"_ He had a composed look on his face that never changed.

His hand moves to my collarbone and stopped. "Are you not afraid that you'll die here?"

_"I'm not."_

_"I believe in Kurosaki-kun. And I know that you won't hurt me."_ I look straight into his eyes; my words were honest and for the first time, I noticed,

that Ulquiorra-kun was fairly handsome.

Maybe I'm going crazy.

"How do you know that I won't kill you right now?"

_"Because you listen to Aizen-sama's orders."_

"Hm." His hand falls back to his side and he turns towards the door.

_"Your presence.. isn't as unnerving as I thought it would be."_

"Those thoughts are foolish." One more glance towards me and he walks out, the door closing behind him.

My heart's racing again. 

_I am foolish, aren't I?_

* * *

_The way he looked at me, so melancholic._

_There was no way of knowing if he ever felt the same things I did._

_But at that moment,_

_my heart felt like it was being torn apart._

_Piece by piece._

_Maybe it's because I knew I was lying to myself._

_I wanted to say it wasn't true._

_I wanted to deny it._

_Deny the way I felt._

* * *

_Wo.. n.._

_W.. an...._

**_Woman._ **

My eyes open slowly, to the sight of Ulquiorra-kun. I perk up quickly, _"..Oh. Is there.. something you need?"_

"Your meal."

 _"Sorry.. I'll eat it later.. I just want to get some sleep."_ I say, groggily.

"I don't care what you do, as long as you're listening." He turns to leave, but I quickly grab his wrist.

"What do you want?" Ulquiorra-kun looks at me, sounding just a little irritated.

 _"Can.. you stay here for a little? Your presence is.. um.."_ I don't know what to say. I don't even know why I'm asking him of this.

He stands next to the couch that I had been sleeping on, not speaking a single word. I can't help but smile, just a little. I lay back down, taking a look at his calm face one more time, before closing my eyes; with that small smile, still on my face.

_I guess I'll be having sweet dreams._

* * *

_"Mm.."_ As I open my eyes, I see Ulquiorra-kun's face, right in front of mine. And **way** too close.

 _"Ah- Ulquiorra-kun..!"_ I slowly sit up, as he backs away. Why was he so close anyways?

Touching my face with my hands, I look at him, slightly embarrassed. _"Why were you so close to me, just now?"_

"You told me to stay here, did you not? I was waiting for you to finally wake up." The realization came to me.

 _"I mean, I did.. But I didn't expect you to stay here,"_ my words, trailing off.

"I'll be leaving now. Make sure you eat your meal. You know what I said last time, woman." A sigh escapes my lips and as I watch his strides, thoughts popped up in my head.

He really stayed here while I slept?

Why would he do that?

Oh, well.

I won't be able to find out anyway.

* * *

_I could never understand him, never._

_He seemed like an emotionless being, so to speak._

_I wish I tried to understand him more._

_Why didn't I?_

_What was stopping me?_

_The little pride I had left?_

_It's too late now._

* * *

**Rumble. Rumble.**

_"Hm?"_ What is that sound?

I can sense his spiritual pressure.

 _"Ulquiorra-kun, is that you?"_ I lean my back against the door, looking at the ceiling.

"I'm just here to keep watch on you, woman." His voice sounds muffled from the door, but very close.

Unconsciously, a smile spread across my face. 

_Is it weird for me to find the presence of an enemy endearing?_

_I'm sure it is._

_"..Are you just going to stand there?"_ I say, crossing my hands behind my back.

"What do you expect from me?"

_"Ah.. Nothing. Just.. Isn't it lonely?"_

"Lonely? Being alone is not a problem for me."

_"Well... For me, I've been alone for a long time. Yet, it still makes me feel sad."_

_"You know.. you can always come in-"_ The door opens and I'm falling backwards,

until a pair of hands catches me.

I look up. _"Ah.. I'm sorry, Ulquiorra-kun.."_ Picking myself back up, I turn towards him. _"Are you.. joining me for a little?"_

"You wouldn't have stopped bothering me anyways." 

_"Ah.. ha ha."_ I don't really know what to say; this is the first time that he's come to talk to me with no other order.

I look around the room and back at him. I grab his right hand with both of mine, _"Still cold." Wait, what am I doing?_

"What are you doing, woman?"

_"...Trying to warm up your hands, or, hand. I noticed your hands were always stone cold, Ulquiorra-kun."_

_"Like when you touched my hair and just now, when you caught me. Doesn't it bother you?"_ I look at him, curiously.

"No. Why are you doing this?"

 _"Cause I wanted to."_ I give him a smile, hoping to see the same from him. A girl can dream, right?

Though, of course, I didn't get what I wanted. The look in his eyes changed just slightly, I don't think anyone else would notice.

But I would.

He takes his hand away from mine, looking off to the side.

_"Is your hand warmer now?"_

"Doesn't matter," he walks away and the door closes.

_Aah~_

_You were supposed to keep an eye on me, Ulquiorra-kun.._

_My heart's feeling weird now because of you._

* * *

_It only hits you when you don't take the chance._

_The opportunity._

_It only weighs down on you when you realize you could've taken it._

_What was I so afraid of?_

_It wasn't him._

_Maybe it was me._

* * *

"Are you afraid? It's over."

"You will die here, all alone, with no contact with anyone."

"I'm asking if you are afraid."

_"I am.. not afraid."_

_"Because everyone came to rescue me.. My heart is with theirs.."_ Ah, was this the moment that I dreamed of?

"Such nonsense."

"Because your friends came for you, you are not afraid?"

"Do you really mean those words?"

_"Yes."_

"What is a heart?"

"If I rip open your chest, will I see it inside?" His hand reaches towards me.

"If I split your skull, will I see it inside?" He moves his hand in front of my eyes.

A small gasp comes from my mouth. Though, I've heard these words before in my dream, they still have a lot of impact.

_I wish I could answer you._

* * *

_Reminiscing about things I could've done is meaningless._

_You aren't here anymore._

_I'm sure if wouldn't have been possible anyways._

_But, you know.._

_I miss you._

* * *

It's, seemingly, the end of Kurosaki-kun and Ulquiorra-kun's fight. For the first time in a while, I'm so nervous that I can almost hear the pounding of my heart.

I can't comprehend what's happening right now.

His devil-like appearance, Ulquiorra-kun's Segunda Etapa form, is fading into dust. 

_He's dying._

"Tch. So this is it." Ulquiorra-kun looks at his dark black wings, slowly disintegrating. He looked at Kurosaki-kun,

"Kill me."

"Make it quick. I have no strength left to even walk.. If you don't kill me now, this duel will remain unsettled forever."

"I refuse." Kurosaki-kun said, with sweat falling down the sides of his face.

"What?"

"I said I don't want to. This is..

**This is no way to win!** "

The whites of Ulquiorra-kun's eyes, which were forest green just now, faded back to normality.

"To the very end.. you just won't do as I want.." He says, with nearly 1/4th of his body, already turned to dust.

He looks at me, "Just when I was finally beginning to become a bit interested in you people."

Stretching his right arm towards me, he says, "Are you afraid of me,

woman?" 

Unknowingly, tears started to fill my eyes. _"I'm not.. afraid..."_

_"..I'm not afraid."_

"I see." With his hand outstretched, I couldn't resist the urge to not grab it. But when I tried, 

his hand began fading to dust too.

It was there for me to hold, but I was too late. My hand stayed stretched out, hoping that I could hold onto his hand, one last time.

"I see now." He spoke quietly, quiet enough that only I could hear.

"In this palm,

is a 'heart'." His last words ring in my ears despite his soft tone, as the rest of his body disintegrated into nothingness.

_Aah.._

_Ulquiorra-kun.._

_Now you're making me cry.._

_I wish I could've told you how I felt._

_Maybe you felt the same, but maybe you didn't._

_Though I hope you understand that.._

_..although I wasn't able to answer you last time._

_Know that,_ _your heart will stay with me._

_Just like, how my heart stayed in your palm, as you faded away._

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! ulquihime's one of my favorite bleach ships, though this really is just a recap + added parts, so i hope i did them well- if you want, leave a comment or a kudos! again, thanks for reading :)


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